I’ve seen a lot of curious people wanting to dive into classical music but don’t know where to start, so I have written out a list of pieces to listen to depending on mood. I’ve only put out a few, but please add more if you want to. hope this helps y’all out. :)
I was just listening to illicit affairs and this lyric hit and I was like OH MY GOD. thank you, @taylorswift this is definitely the cherry on top of my election meme making sundae.
being tired all the time is such a mystery…. is it anaemia? vitamin d deficiency? chronic fatigue syndrome? depression? insomnia?? is it just the crushing weight of being alive in a capitalist society??? someone cure me
bitches will bring a million things to do on a train ride or long car trip and then spend the entire time looking out the window and daydreaming. i’m bitches
April is the cruelest month. Mostly because it only serves to remind me that I’m another year older and still have nothing to show for it. Part of me wants to go back and do a lot of it all over again. The other half of me is like “fuck that shit.” Eliot also said that “winter kept us warm, covering earth in forgetful snow.” And now, with April, with spring, all of the things we tried to bury away are coming to the surface again. I can remember what a bad place I was in at this time last year and I sometimes feel myself slipping back into that. And then I think about it and I realize that it wasn’t just last year: I apparently have a thing for getting the dark and twisties around springtime, because it was like this the year before and then the year before that, I was all jacked up because I was graduating from college…my old roommates can testify to the fact that I was having a near mental breakdown in our kitchen every other night over finishing college (aka impending doom). There are days where I just don’t even want to get out of bed because I feel so useless. And I wonder how it feels to do something worthwhile with your life or how it would feel to actually do something productive with the degree I spent four years and thirty grand on. But I feel that I’ve always been mediocre at best; I’ve never done anything of great importance. I’ve never been the best at anything. I don’t have any extraordinary talents. Most days, I don’t even feel like I have any particular affinity for the thing I actually went to school for in the first place. I sit in my car and wonder what would happen if I ran a red light; I try to remember what things were like before and how I felt before everything went all wrong. I stare at old memories for hours; I would let the nostalgia swallow me up whole if it wanted to. I sit in silence and close my eyes and try to remember how things used to be.
Have you ever tried to remember the first time you did or heard something? Something important to you now? I try and so very often, I can’t do it. How can that be?
I want a re-do on so many of those things that I can hardly remember. I want to try to harder; I want to be better; I want to want to remember so many of the things I have actually retained in my head.
I am so out of patience and strength and good grace…all of the things I need in order to let go of the shit I’m hugging so tightly that it’s about to crack ribs. I’m just tired. And I want things to be the same as they were, but I also want to go some place completely new and start over with no traces of the past.
Like I said, it’s dark and twisty season. It’ll pass, it’ll pass…..
I opened a new tab; I was going to barf some feelings out and throw it into the Tumblr void because historically, it’s helped lift some kind of weight, strangely. I suppose it’s because I have anonymity here and it doesn’t really matter. But I had already gone digging around in old posts and memories the other day and had this old post open. I read it again. And again. And realized not that much has really changed in 7 years. So I’ll just re-post this old word vomit. It’s still the same old, same old anyway. Even now. It will pass. But it does come back. It’s never truly gone.
